Plight to Protection. Evaluating a Week of Black Women Trauma

Words by Matthew Spence:

[Trigger Warning: This article does mention heavy subject matters of Domestic Violence, Sexual Assualt/Violence, Abuse in various forms, Anti-Blackness, and other shit that is harmful and disheartening. Discretion is Advised]

Pay attention, because you’re about to read an article from someone who lost some brain functions due to researching portions of it. More on that later, though.

 

 

Never underestimate the stealthiness of time and the power of “shit happens” occurring, and when the two tag team, it can lead to either undesired experiences or scrapbook memories. Yet, sadly, the experience of Black women has been the former, in an eye-opening week for many, but this is the usual for others. Within days of each other, the plight of Black women has been plastered in the news cycle and in culture publications for the past couple of weeks now, to the point where Tyler Perry couldn’t fit it all in a 5-hour flick. Ultimately leading to another back-and-forth with those who are wronged by the system/society and those who are too blind and belligerent to see the damage being done. Victims are being shamed, and abusers are having golden and platinum statues made of them.

4 Stories:

Standing by Cassie as she takes the stand:

The trial of the decade, it feels like. Puffy, Puff, Puff Daddy, P. Diddy, Diddy, Sean John, Brutha Love, the dude who made that awful Godzilla song. No matter how the public knows him or refers to him, Cassie will forever know him as the person who took advantage of her mentally, emotionally, and physically, and in every other despicable way you can imagine (but you probably don’t wanna imagine). Rape, physical abuse, blackmail. Dude, it’s all awful. Now, she’s been currently taking the stand against Diddy (he’s on trial for racketeering, sex trafficking, etc., not necessarily on trial for any cases/accusations towards her) and having to explore, explain, and relive the horrific accounts of the abusive and human violations over and over again. All in front of her loved ones and support system, but also in front of the man himself who caused it all. Yet, people have had the gall to spew contention towards her, such as “Why didn’t she leave then?” and “She clearly wanted to be involved,” expelling all of the factors of why Cassie or any other victim of that matter stays in a relationship like that. Keep it quick. The motherfucker was rich, powerful, heavily connected music exec who was abusive in many facets: physically, sexually, etc. Who’s known her since 19 and barely out of adolescence, who used his power of money, fear, and manipulation to keep her in (even if there was a stint where she might’ve wanted to stay, Stockholm syndrome is a thing, yo)….. and BLACKMAILING HER PARENT FOR $20k or HE’LL RELEASE A SEX TAPE INVOLVING HER! Dawg.

Megan Thee Stallion:

No matter how hard she seems to be trying to move on with her life and keep peace of mind in an already cutthroat and problematic industry, Megan Thee Stallion technically found justice with her shooter, Tory Lanez (yes, I know he’s an artist and had a career before the incident). That really isn’t important for the context unless you’re on that “Illuminati! Roc Nation wanted to stop his independent run” ass dudes) Got sent to prison for it. By now, it should be an open-and-shut case; recently, Tory was allegedly stabbed in prison 14 times (the attack was apparently unrelated to Megan), which opened the floodgates for “Meg is the cause of this” and “Free Tory.” Now, Tory, his team, and everyone on the outside are switching up the story again and pushing the narrative once more: “Megan is Lying” and reviving the Free Tory movement. With new witnesses and evidence (for some reason, they weren’t around when they were needed the most). To where Megan had put out a statement.

“At what point are yall gonna stop making me have to re live being shot BY TORY !? At what point are Tory and yall FANS gonna stop lying ? Like how much is the check to keep harassing me? Why is this happening EVERY DAY?? One min him/ yall said I was never shot now yall letting him play in yall face AGAIN and say I was shot but it wasn’t him oh okay… ?! I’m sick of this shit LEAVE ME TF ALONE!!!! HE AINT DARE GET ON THAT STAND AND DENY HE SHOT ME AND THAT WAS HIS CHOICE BECAUSE HE KNOWS DID THAT SHIT! IDGAF ABT A BLOG OR A BOT!!! WHY IN TF WOULD ME … MEGAN THEE STALLION HAVE TO LIE ON THIS MF ABT SHOOTING ME! How yall mad at the person that got shot ???? FACTS ARE FACTS , he did it , it was PROVEN IN COURT fuck the hate campaign on the internet TORY YOU SHOT ME !! Ain’t no new fucking evidence yall been saying the same shit for years TORY PLEASE LEAVE ME ALONE you a fucking demon. I’m off this silly ass internet shit, BYE”

 

First, it was “She wasn’t shot, it was glass,” now “Her friend shot her, not Tory.” Which is it, yo?

 

Halle Bailey: Halle experienced an unbelievable amount of racism when she was cast as Ariel in The Little Mermaid (the live-action remake). Now, she’s being called a “great actor” as people are throwing more dirt on her name and her existence. Filing a restraining order against her partner and father of her child, DDG (hip-hop artist and streamer). Accusing him of physical abuse and problematic behavior that made her fearful for her life and the safety of their child. With photos and text messages for proof. Yet, people are taking this time to dogpile and spit on her name.

Doechii: While Doechii’s hate train has been happening over the past few months, it hasn’t been necessarily as traumatic or violent as the former names mentioned. However, it can’t go understated how unwarranted and unnecessarily exaggerated it’s been. But Aidin Ross took it to another level. Ranting about her snapping at her team at the Met Gala about not wanting her fit to be seen too early. Now, was Doechii a little out of line for that? A little, she could’ve toned it down a bit, but it’s NOT that deep to warrant the shit Aidin said. Which was extremely disrespectful and honestly made me uncomfortable.

 

 

I said this before, and I’ll say this again and always will. When White people get too comfortable is when shit goes wrong. Case in Point. (Seriously, I hope and want this to be the last time I mention Aidin Ross, dear God, Cause the shit he said, that’s not some shit you should get away with yo. Cause why did he throw in “unintelligent”?

 

4 Black women of different shades and backgrounds, within the span of a few days of each other, have been facing an immense amount of disrespectful scrutiny and being demonized at the public round table by people across all boards, including by those who look like them. Malcolm X gave us the golden lesson on misogynoir decades ago.

 

Yet, it’s beyond going through one ear and out the other, but instead just hitting people’s thick skulls and falling like a bird hitting a window.

 

In fact, it feels like the gender wars grow larger and more dense as days fly off the calendar. Fueled by the Red-Pill Manosphere circles, systemic problems, and dudes who only read the headlines and not the full article. The undermining, ridicule, and mocking of Black women’s trauma amplified over the past few days, which led to me asking more “whys” than Jadakiss. The answers ultimately are all so layered and require a scholarship to an HBCU and pulling all-nighters to research and unpack. Why are Black women often left to fend for themselves and mistreated when they need help? Why are men (and some women, too) so quick to lean more towards the alleged abusers? Why are people so fucked? Whelp, in preparation for this article, I did some research and went to the dark side of the moon. Sadly, not the cool Pink Floyd kind. Yes, that’s right, finding other perspectives on how and why people feel the way they do about these particular cases I mentioned. So, that entails watching Akademiks, Myron Gaines (the Fresh and Fit dude), and Aidin Ross. While also rummaging through problematic Instagram and Twitter (or seeing tweets outside of Twitter, cause I’m not joining Twitter again). I call it “Operation: Doomsday,” cause holy shit. It was like preparing and walking into Armageddon.

After doing 8 Mile preparation in the bathroom, I began my journey. After a few hours and some change, I was more physically exhausted and mentally out of whack, that my introvertedness decreased by 2 and my stupidity increased by 5.

 

 

Time for seriousness. We all know why instances like this happen. Centuries upon decades, years upon days of racism spread across and misogyny layered on top of it, combined with internal racism and self-hatred/anti-Blackness among Black people themselves and just an orgy of other fucked-up shit that explains the misogynoir and the battles Black women face today. Even if you don’t account for those factors, discretion isn’t even a concern for some of these people (in particular, men). Grace isn’t a thing, no “Ok, let’s see how this plays out” or “I wanna see both sides and their evidence before I decide,” instead it’s a hard “SHE’S FUCKING LYING” “He’s trying to buy NBC.” It feels like dudes over the past few years have felt under attack, so now they’re in critical mode, doing anything they can to defend their own, no matter whether they truly think they’re innocent or not. Think of the O.J. case; you know how many Black people were happy when he was acquitted of the murder of Nicole Brown, even though they knew and believed that he did it. They were just happy a Black man got away from the system that usually fucks us over for less. It’s like a cesspool of ignorance and ego. It’s bonkers, yo.

Give them a laundry list of 1000 court cases of [insert domestic/violent crime]. A lot of these men are quick to circle and star the 9 cases of women lying/falsifying claims against their partner in the list of over 900 cases where it’s cut and dry of men being rightfully accused. Now, I was throwing out random numbers as statistics for that example, and this isn’t to negate cases of women being malicious towards their partner, whether domestically, legally, and so on. People can be shitty no matter who they are. However, the immediate action to not only side with the alleged abuser but also to degrade and humiliate the alleged victim blows me. There are gonna be some people who view this as a “Pick Me” article, like “Hey, I’m one of the good ones.” It goes beyond parasocial, yo; this isn’t about being fans, it’s about ethics. Morals. Right and wrong.

WE DON’T KNOW THESE NIGGAS.

 

 

It’s a week that we may reflect on in infamy. Abusers (alleged/confirmed) getting caught up in unsettling predicaments, which also includes Chris Brown getting arrested in the UK over an incident from a couple of years ago. It feels like Lauryn Hill’s Miseducation is being showcased right before our eyes.

 

 

[Note: I’m not saying Tory allegedly getting stabbed or Chris getting arrested is karma for their history of abuse; it’s just so interesting how the universe has been playing out.]

Why does all of this singe a part of my consciousness? Well, on top of it being immoral and unethical violations, I feel from culture and society. Black women are important to my life, and the older I get, the more clearly I understand that. And I’m proud of that fact. If you’re skipping your daily CoolMath4Kids login, you’re good, I’m not gonna snitch, but this isn’t gonna be a cheat day. You’re not gonna R1,R2, L1, Left, Down, Right, Up, Left, Down, Right, Up out of a math-free day. We’re gonna do quick Black Math (no Jack White isn’t here to teach).

Quick Equation: 7+3=?. Solve.

7. A long time ago and a 15-minute drive away, Sicko Mo-Bamba was the only epidemic people were annoyed by. 2018. 7 years ago. All while culture was happening, I was soaking it in as this community college student started to take writing and journalism seriously.

3. As of now, for 3 years, you’ve been in my dreams. This site has been up and running for the magic number.

 

OK! Time! Pencils down. Now, have you solved the answer??? Not judging; if not, I judge the education system, not the student.

10. Walk through the Cherry Colosseum, and you’ll see photos of all the interviewees. I’ve been extremely grateful for them wanting to talk to me. At least 10 are Black women (about 13 to 14) out of 32 interview pieces. That’s damn near half. Now, I couldn’t honestly tell if you this was all intentional to spotlight Black women or all subconscious, but I can say most there will be more in the future; Black women continue to create dope shit.

The current face of Cherry-Tape is a Black woman. Sasha. Shout-out to her.

Outside of the office, even before living la vida Almost Famous, Black women have played significant roles in my life. To my near and dear best friends, as an adult, to being pampered and coddled by the women in my extended family when I was a kid (you know, when I wasn’t playing Jimmy Neutron: Backyard Smashball on the desktop). My close cousin, who’s like the sister I never had (I’m from a family of all boys, and coincidentally, she’s from a family of all girls). I don’t know when I’ll get this whole “Life” thing right, but I know for a fact Black women have played a part in me getting to 50% progress. Teaching me how to right my wrong behaviors, and if I had a dime for every time I’ve been checked by a Black woman, I could invest in a Malibu property and buy a pack of TNT Pop-Its. Disciplined, strong, and outspoken, all while carrying an unworldly level of comfort, guidance, love, and support that you thought only existed in a Disney movie. Alongside their heightened 7th sense, I swear Black women have this level of foresight and energy reading that no one else has. Black women have inspired me in more ways than most. They’re the gold standard.

 

Yet, time and time again, society constantly lets them down. From their morbid statistics/percentages of experiencing violence, abuse, murder, and just so much horrific shit. It sucks knowing I can’t turn this painful world into a fantastic planet with a snap of a finger. All I can do, and hopefully everyone else, is try to make life easier for the person next to us. If I had it my way, I’d get rid of all of the sludge that covers the potential of a euphoric world. Turn off racism and misogynoir like a clap-on/off light, and undo centuries of external turmoil and internal damage to society that people still suffer from today, along with so much that can be done. I’m stumped. And that’s real. All I can do and hope everyone reading this can follow their own trail by doing what they can to deflate society’s/culture’s problematic balloon, even if it’s by 1%. However, it may be spreading awareness to certain organizations, signing petitions, protesting, and trying to correct inner circle microaggressions. Perhaps fixing your wrongdoings in the plight of Black women. Whatever it may be.

All shades from light to dark, to whole and mixed, to cis and trans. PROTECT BLACK WOMEN